V is for Vodka

If you’ve decided to forgo the night out and just keep it low key this VD (or as I like to call it, Vodka Appreciation Day), it doesn’t get any easier than popping in a DVD (or VHS for the oldies-but-goodies out there!) and staying in for the evening. (If you’re still on the fence about braving a V-day crowd of coupled-up kooks this February, here’s an image for laughs: SJP and Cynthia Nixon in last year’s SATC flick batting away curled balloon strings while trying to have a meal.) If you’re wondering how to revolt against yet another over-rated and overly-commercialized holiday- here it is: a no muss, no fuss movie night. For all you single ladies out there (who, despite the catchy tune, feels Beyonce strutting around without a ring is really just Ms. Jay-Z wanting to rule the airwaves yet again by penning a kick-ass girl power track-remember Survivor?), I know what you’re thinking: Just spare me the saccharine happy-endings, right?

Yeah, I’m with you on that one. My personal favorites expertly turn the genre on its head. My Best Friend’s Wedding has an exquisitely bittersweet finale, with a jilted Julia Roberts in one of her finest performances. A more recent take on the doomed relationship is 2009’s 500 Days of Summer, a break-up framed entirely as a series of flashbacks. Another delightful surprise is Broken English (2007), an under-the-radar indie flick with none other than the indie queen herself Parker Posey playing an unlucky single in her mid –thirties dealing with her own painful bouts of self-sabatoge when the too-good-to-be-true French hunk (played by Melvil Poupaud) enters her life.

Speaking of movies, it seems as though the large ensemble cast formula for feature films is here to stay. After Crash took home the Oscar for best picture in 2005, it seems like every production company and team wants to take a crack at it. Some would say 2003’s Love Actually revived the form for rom coms, especially in terms of the seemingly random (but carefully orchestrated) inter-connectivity between initial strangers; since then, with films like 2006’s Paris, Je’taime (which spawned the New York version New York, I Love You), 2009’s He’s Just Not That Into You and next month’s highly anticipated start-studded ensemble Valentine’s Day, the market for movie viewers who want to kill 15 celebrity birds with one movie ticket seems to be a pretty sure thing.

Of course, movie execs and marketing experts know to release these (and other cheese-tastic celluloid delights) just before V-day. How else would countless hopeless-romantic s justify the one day they get to drag their kicking-and-screaming boyfriends (or discreetly resistant but outwardly compliant and enthusiastic boyfriend-hopefuls) to shell out the 10 bones to watch Kate Hudson or Mandy Moore frolic around in too many costume changes (when let’s face it, they’d much rather be at Daybreakers watching a zombie throw down or the Denzel flick)?
Though it’s interesting to note that to date, the highest grossing rom com since the late 70’s is My Big Fat Greek Wedding, a cross-cultural story which revolves around a thirty-something year old single woman who finds love after already being labeled a veritable old maid by her family members. Guaranteed laughs revolve around the film’s comedic rhythm which depends primarily on the moments of hesitation with which most of us approach situations of cultural difference and unfamiliarity. The whitest of whites and the Greek-est of Greeks collide in scenes of hilarious courtship and an equally flamboyant and poignant marriage ceremony.

Nia Vardalo’s overnight success is followed closely by Nancy Meyer’s hit film What Women Want, starring Mel Gibson (pre-Passion of the Christ) and Helen Hunt. The plot revolves around a chauvinistic Gibson who, by way of a serendipitous electrocution, is able to read women’s minds, (unbeknownst to the women). Film as escapism at its best, my friends. If only men were half as intuitive, am I right ladies?

Whatever you end up doing (or not doing), here are some other ideas on how to pass the time this Valentine’s Day! And since some have argued that the best remedy for depression is hard liquor, my last word of advice to you would be to keep your bar fully stocked come February 14th.

Brrrrring on the Heat

For various reasons, I rarely rave about the weather here in Socal. Most locals take the sun for granted, I suppose. If you've been surrounded by something your whole life, you hardly see it anymore until an outsider mentions it. The sun, the traffic, the superficiality. That's why I can always spot an out-of-towner by the way they talk about the weather (or by the fact that they even mention it at all). I guess by comparison, I must admit that having an 80 degree Christmas is pretty insane. While others freeze their tails off trying to stay warm and out of the snow/sleet/cold, us SoCalers are slathering on sunblock and schlepping around in flip flops.

Seriously, if you're from the East coast (or from anywhere in the Deep South where temperatures are at record lows right now), I bet you're scoffing at me right now. I sleep with the window open, yell at my roomates when they leave the heater on too long and wear scarves primarily as a fashion accessory. But I secretly long for the kind of weather that would warrant the guilty-pleasure purchase of the infamous Ugg boots. Though I can’t help but think that every time I see those ubiquitous Sherpa-lined suede concoctions it must be a veritable slap-in-the-face to those truly struggling to keep warm. Especially when paired –quite intentionally- with mini skirts, booty shorts and sometimes just spandex tights with no additional bottoms (Lady Gaga would be so proud). No matter how much I want them, Socal weather doesn’t seem to justify shelling out the 150 bones.

But this recent cold snap is no joke. We’ve got people falling over dead in their own homes, iguanas shutting down and going into hibernation (no really, that’s not a joke) and falling out of trees. And that’s in South Florida, the state of year round humidity. If you’re wondering how to stay warm under genuinely cold circumstances, check out some of these helpful bits. Otherwise, I suggest you find a working heater (or someone that has one) and hold on to it for dear life.